TV not making sense? It's not the DTV conversion...

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Posted by on June 14, 2009 at 08:03:03:

TV not making sense? It's not because you forgot to convert from analog to digital

Phil Rosenthal | Tribune Media

June 14, 2009

Spoiler alert. Stop reading now if you do not want to know how it all turns out:

It's not the digital conversion. The reason you no longer get programs on your old over-the-air analog TV is that CBS, ABC, NBC and Fox all decided you've watched enough television for a while. Why don't you play outside?

John Salley will be the last man standing and win NBC's "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here," but there will be an investigation into how Patti Blagojevich somehow wound up with the most money for her charity.

David Letterman is about to sign a contract extension that will keep him as host of CBS' "Late Show" at least until 2012. Apparently, CBS wants him around for his 65th birthday, his 30th anniversary as a network late-night host and Sarah Palin's victory in the New Hampshire primary.

The success of Comedy Central's Stephen Colbert as guest editor of Newsweek means one thing: Colbert is no longer a contender to become Time's Man of the Year.

Because of its quickie divorce from anchor Bob Sirott, WMAQ-Ch. 5 probably will have to scrap a bunch of promos Sirott taped in January at NBC Tower with Conan O'Brien to promote O'Brien's new "Tonight Show." Sure, the station might try to digitally insert someone else. But I had a doctor do that once, and it hurts.

If the economy doesn't improve, HGTV's "Curb Appeal" will move from featuring houses to showcasing cars. "It sleeps four and gets decent mileage. Think of your hatchback as a solarium."

First John Madden, who traveled by luxury coach, left NBC's Sunday night football team. Then Tony Kornheiser, who refused to fly, left ESPN's Monday night football team. Then Jerome "The Bus" Bettis was knocked off NBC's Sunday football studio show.

So much for the ground game this season in the NFL.

Even in digital, Jimmy Fallon often lacks focus.

Local sportscasters inevitably will say that the Cubs-White Sox interleague series has a playoff feel to it. Makes sense. They're playing all the games in Chicago, so it's just like the postseason. They're not going anywhere.

Time flies when you're having fun. Or in a coma.

CNN's Larry King is out promoting yet another book about his life. You might think he's put out a lot of books on his life. But each one only covers about 50 years or so.

NBC's PR department, citing the size of his edge among young viewers, is crowing that Conan O'Brien is the new king of late-night TV. David Letterman has beaten O'Brien in viewership on some nights. You know who was winning the war in late-night at the end of last week? Sarah Palin.

Morning man Lin Brehmer rightly complained after CBS Radio's WXRT-FM 93.1 sent out an e-mail under his signature, urging listeners to lobby Congress against the performance royalties for which the recording industry is pushing.

Of course, making it appear that someone is saying something that they're not is straight out of the recording industry's playbook: It's called lip-syncing.

"I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here" looks so realistic in digital high definition, you'll swear it leaves a ring around your room.

And finally, seeing "The Daily Show" take aim at The New York Times' woes in the digital age is yet another reminder that those of us in this business must come up with a way to save newspapers. Otherwise, journalists will wind up on the streets. What's worse, we'll have nothing to use for blankets.

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